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We're back [17 Sep 2003|07:10pm]
I made chicken tetrazini this night. The recipe called for fresh chicken, but I used frozen. It tasted good, reminded me of high school. Chicken tetrazini days were always good days.

Last Friday was Matt's birthday. Matt is this graduate student I met last year. He dated Dorothy (of boxing fame) for a while. It didn't last, she dropped him. Said he was too clingy and emotional. Over the summer Lua and Kristen hung out with him a lot. They gained a distaste for him, saying he complained too much.
The Matt partyCollapse )

The art partyCollapse )

Then sunday, and nothing happened.

The ramblings...partyCollapse )

I guess I should get back to work.
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[17 Sep 2003|08:48am]
I've got two minutes before the trip to class has to happen. A little stuff going on, some good, some mediocre. This is more or less a reminder to my self to put it up later. Stay tuned. That sounded really stupid, stay tuned. It's like I'm going to commercial. Right, stay tuned anyway.
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a screwdriver? [03 Sep 2003|08:48am]

What Is Your Battle Cry?

Running amidst the icy wasteland, wielding a sharpened screwdriver, cometh Frozenphoenix! And he gives a mighty scream:

"Hail the blood-letting! I swear that on this night, you shall dine in hell!"

Find out!
Enter username:
Are you a girl, or a guy ?

created by beatings : powered by monkeys

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First day of class [27 Aug 2003|07:07pm]
I was really excited to get back to class, but I'm afraid school sucks again. I was trying to get into a creative writing class, in fact I was second on the waitlist. Unfortunatly, upon checking for room changes, I noticed that the wait-list had dissapeared. I called the registrar about this and apparently if you weren't a part-time student your waitlisted courses got dropped. I still don't understand why the university college students get first choice at everything. Yeah, they're working probably, and have tighter schedules, but I doubt any were trying to get into creative writing anyway. As of right now these are my classes:

Organic chemistry (gives me the most fear)
Molecular biology (looks like genetics only with more deapth...supergenetics?)
Fundamentals of acting (a theater class? I know, but the drawing teacher scared me)
Introduction to Latin literature (nothing but translation, should be alright)
Probability and statistics

Alright, probstat needs more than just a parenthetical phrase. First, I strongly dislike math. With calculus behind me this would be the last math course I'd have to take ever. I can already tell it's going to suck though. The teacher seems really I'll prepared, and for some reason I go to this one four times a week instead of three. Ironically, the teacher has an accent so when she says "statistics" it sounds like "sadistics." This class must and probably will be dropped. I'll have to take it eventually, but I'd much rather take it four days a week for a month (ie. the summer section) than four days a week for four months.

I'm surprised the old anxiety has come back so soon. I'm sure once I get my classes in order, I'll be able to relax again.
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Strangely, watching Heather get hit by a sub-way train hasn't gotten old [21 Aug 2003|07:36am]
Back in New Orleans with school starting wednesday. I tried to come back last night, but I thought it would be cooler to crash in a ditch off the side of an interstate. A week of work later, I tried again and here I am. It would have been quite expensive had I not found some quality used parts. Also, junkyards. Junkyards are great, they're mountains of stuff that nobody wants anymore. I could seriously wander around this one outside of Gadsden for hours.

I've got some work to do in order to prepare for next week, but there's Silent Hill 3. I knew I'd be losing my life to it. Funny note on that, there's a toilet that blocked and you have the option of telling Heather (the game's hero) to try and remove it. If you do, she makes a disgusted sound and looks directly at the camera saying, "What kind of sicko would even think of doing that?" I then thought of James (from Silent Hill 2), who did just that and did it without complaining. I smiled. Yeah, video games have ruined me.

While I was in Gadsden, I read Jennifer Government. It's a fun book, but it's characters are two-dimensional and the social statement is so exaggerated it verges on being silly. Supposedly, it's going to be made into a movie. This might be one of those rare occasions that a book turns out better as a movie.

I woke up a 6:30 this morning for some reason. Guess my body's telling me I need to get to work. I suppose I'll go do that. Remember, Captain Jelly says what goes.
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Great personal madness in the southeastern united states [03 Aug 2003|08:42pm]
I'm going to the roost on wednesday; the roost being my mother's house. Foremost, I'm going to retrieve my automobile. This relieing on others for gathering the basic nutritional necessities of exsistance has gotten a little tired. I knew for sure that I wasn't living the rich American lifestyle that I was promised when dinner consited of shells and cheese with spam cut into it, and my evening relaxation beverage is made of sprite and gin that I found when I moved in. I'm not sure how wise it is to be drinking that, but it hasn't killed me yet. At any rate, since I'll be getting back on my own power, my return date is a little blurry. I hope to come up to Hixson at some point and see people. If your there and you want to be seen, you should make yourself known.

In other news, I'm apparently entering another one of those lonely/desperate times in my life. This actually fills me with terror because the last time I was getting like this was the whole Kim scenario. For those of you that haven't heard the story, just imagine the most contrived instance of self-abating adulation. The scars on my soul have quit hurting, but I'm still filled with shame when I think of how I was because of that person. And, no, I never got to fuck her, which could be the silver lining of the story; I would probably feel like less of a human being now if all my personal anguish had turned up some reward. It would give me the idea that if you suffer for something, you'll get it eventually wheras you can suffer for something and still never have it. Nevertheles, I don't intend to make the same mistake twice. With this new person I plan to tred much more carefully, if I tread at all. Nothing will come of it whatsoever, I already know that, but everyone needs a dream. There is also someone who may serve as a fall back if all else fails, though I'd probably drink myself into an amnesiatic stupor before I'd get entangled in that. Being vague makes you cool.
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Some lite philosophy. [09 Jul 2003|10:08pm]
When I'm in a brooding mood I tend to question my place in the world, and how I relate to other people. I always end up with some depressing conclusion about not being of any consequence. I'm not sure why it happens, but it always does. There's probably truth to it, but it doesn't seem to matter quite so much when I'm on the upswing. A fun thing you can do if you get bored is go through my past entries and try to guess whether I'm in an up or down state of mind by judging what I've written. I'll go ahead and give this one away; I'm on the way up.

I've often considered the state of my mental health. I've never actually been to a professional analyst, so I've really no idea where I would fall in the sanity spectrum. I guess I'll never go because if I go in expecting a diagnosis and get told I'm normal I'll feel ripped off. At least if I could say, "I'm bipolar/schitzotypal/anything else," I'd have an excuse and be able to add some depth to my character. I know I said I was on the way up, but I'm not there yet. Everybody needs a crutch of explanation and some sort of object of self. I'm convinced of this when I hear people speak with pride of their suppposed mental disorders.

I think I get closest to findng some sort of purpose to my life when I'm in my depressive mode. For weeks now, I've been aching to create, yet I don't even know where to begin or what to create. It's like there's a void where great ideas used to come from. I could blame the bombardment on my senses by TV/Internet with their constant flow of new ideas or at least new representations of the same ideas. As such my own center for creation could have shrivled from disuse. I fear that could really be the case. I must find a way to get it back. That's the only way I think I could drive the feelings of worthlessness away; to make something worthy. So that's my quest for now, I'll ponder and dwell until I succeed. Or until I grow complacent with my lot once more. Either way, we'll see what real progress has been made the next time I'm down.

In conclusion, I hate high-quality scan sites. I mean, I appreciate the webmasters' plan of trying to bring me center-fold quality images, but when it takes a minute and fifty seconds from starting the load to see even a nipple (I'm on a high-speed connection, too), I just can't do anything with it. You think about that.
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right [04 Jul 2003|12:20am]
I don't make many entries; there are no excuses. My computer was dead for a while; now it's back. I should stick to chronological order, however.

Lua and Matt came over; last week, I guess. I further suppose that the animosities between Lua and myself have dissolved, which is good, I've been striving for something of a more peaceful existance. We watched a canadian action, kung-fu, horror, comedy, musical by the name of Jesus Christ: Vampire Hunter. All I can say is that the making of that movie was $30,000 well-spent. At some point in the evening the statement, "You'd have hot goth girls all over you if you weren't so mellow...that's a quote," came up. For some reason Lua is trying to revive a part of my mind that I think I've successfully murdered. Whoever was the originator of that statement must have been confused, but then again, they don't know what I know.

Last Saturday, I went to the house of my employer/advisor for a party of sorts. There was beer and there was rice liqour. I came to the realization as I moved towards drukenness with a dozen Chinese biology PhD's that I must be one of the most innapropriate individuals in existence. Not by virtue of my words or actions, mind you, but my existence itself seems like it wasn't really suposed to happen like it has.

One of my hard drives crashed Sunday morning. Complete mechanical failure...on the master drive. The new drive came in today, and I've spent most of my time up until now trying to make things as they were. The registry resides on the master drive. As a result, I lost all installed programs, even the ones that were installed to the slave. When a computer is your umbilical cord to current events, entertainment, and communication you are very alone when something happens to it.

I've come across several kinds of people. There's the drones who are technically sane but lack a creative spirit. The fortunate who are sane and creative. The misunderstood who are less than sane but have an extrodinary creative gift. And the lost who are neither sane nor creative. Which are you?
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Much like Professor Lester, I've been indisposed in a strange realm [09 Jun 2003|01:08am]
[ mood | hot ]

Okay so it was Alabama, but I'll take creative liberty wherever I can find it. So I was with my Mom for a couple of weeks and now I'm back in my New Orleans apartment. I haven't been here too long, but things look like they're going to be all right. It is freaking hot here, though, and I'll I have for air conditioning are two window units. Still, it's a fine place to live. Until I start my summer genetics class on the thirtieth, I'll be trying to keep myself busy with fencing and work at the lab.

As for fencing, it was my first day with the summer fencing club today. It's really not all that different from the club I went to on Thursday. It's really all the same people with a few extras mixed in. There also seems to be a beginners' class that will be held an hour before regular meetings on Tuesdays and Thursdays; they asked me if I wanted to help out, and I decided it was worth a shot. If nothing else I get to feel some sense of authority.

Other than that, it's going to be pretty boring around here for a while.
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I'm "trendy" and "with the times" [03 May 2003|03:02pm]
The Dante's Inferno Test has banished you to the Sixth Level of Hell - The City of Dis!
Here is how you matched up against all the levels:
Purgatory (Repenting Believers)Very Low
Level 1 - Limbo (Virtuous Non-Believers)Low
Level 2 (Lustful)High
Level 3 (Gluttonous)Moderate
Level 4 (Prodigal and Avaricious)Moderate
Level 5 (Wrathful and Gloomy)Very High
Level 6 - The City of Dis (Heretics)Extreme
Level 7 (Violent)High
Level 8- the Malebolge (Fraudulent, Malicious, Panderers)Moderate
Level 9 - Cocytus (Treacherous)High

Take the Dante Inferno Hell Test

Two more finals to go.
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Questioning existence...again [28 Apr 2003|01:21am]
[ mood | tired ]

Went to see some fights last night. One of Andy's friends is a grappler, and there was an event happening at some bar. It was actually a mix of several different fights. Boxing, kick boxing, grappling, etc. There were also stripper fights, which were entertaining. At some point they sought some girls to fight and Dorothy, a girl that was with us, volunteered. It's sounds rather odd, but she is so awesome it hurts to be in her presence. Like staring into the sun, I suppose. Obviously, I'm crazy about her, which sucks because I always end up weighing my value as a human being and always find myself wanting. It could be any number of things, but I believe that it is because of this non-stop self-scrutiny that I've become more pensive over the past few days. No matter, when I reach the point where I can accept all the failures of my being I'll be one step closer to enlightenment. Or something. Regretting turing down the offer to out for drunkenness with Brandon a lot right now.

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What a great birthday present [14 Apr 2003|07:56pm]
[ mood | sick ]

Tommorrow is my birthday. Ninteen is one of those worthless transitional ages, but I'll take what I can get. In terms of presents, all I want is to get over this headpounding, nasal congested death.

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Guess what [01 Apr 2003|11:19pm]
I got laid today, and my world became happy and beautiful for ever and ever........

...April Fool's! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA...Ha...ha...ha...*weep*
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You're liver won't thank you [22 Mar 2003|05:21pm]
[ mood | exhausted ]

Pro-tip: Don't start taking shots of vodka 24 minutes into a hour of power.

So I went to Jakob's with Andy, Brandon, Dorothy, and Dorothy's sister to consume lots of intoxicating liquids. Andy got the brilliant idea that we should have an hour of power. That basically consists of taking a shot of beer every minute for an hour, and it translates to a can every 8 minutes. I had to quit after 24 minutes because each shot was becoming increasingly thicker. Then I started with the vodka. I speant forty-five minutes talking madness with an equally drunk Brandon before crawling under a table and spending the rest of the night in a fetal position. I was able to fight the sickness as long as I didn't move. Also, Dorothy came by every once in a while and fed me water so it turned out alright. I woke up around 6 in the morning feeling like hell and dragged my ass back to Sharp where I fell into bed and slept until 1. Then I went swimming! I must be the smartest person ever. And my arms feel funny.

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Crush 10 peasants to achieve burnination [20 Mar 2003|01:31pm]
[ mood | excited ]

I made an 89 on my Chemistry test. Take that, universe!

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I panic easily [09 Mar 2003|06:43pm]
Still nothing has happened, I guess all my speculation was for nothing. That's when they get you. Anyway, my birthday still isn't for another month, but I thought I'd use what I want for some filler:


and Out in the Magic Kingdom



One of these
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Here's something I haven't done in a while [02 Mar 2003|04:24pm]

:: how nintendo are you? ::
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Misc [28 Feb 2003|10:43am]
[ mood | complacent ]

Today is the last day before Mardi Gras break, and I feel like I'm catching the death. That figures, but I won't let it ruin everything. I've been going to various parades, here's a list of the krewes I've seen:
-Ancient Druids
-Knights of Babylon
-Knights of Chaos

I'll be going to several more, but the one I'm most looking forward to is Bacchus. Speaking of Bacchus, holy crap, this is awesome.

My Latin instructor won't be teaching here after this semester because he has gotten a job at another university. The name of that university is the university of Tennessee at Knoxville. So, all of you people up there at UTK (especially Adam) should take one of his classes. His name is Dr. Sklenar, and he is a Latin guru.

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You know those cheap Japanese cartoons? This is a cheap Afghani knock off of that. It's Afghanistanimation! [23 Feb 2003|12:19pm]
I went to a pair of parades last night with a few people, got a mighty fistfull of beads, and was slightly disappointed at the lack of alchohol. I'm fairly certain there will be more parades in the future and with pictures. Until then, I need to get some batteries for my camera.

After I got back from the parades, I went over to Brandon's and watched Super Troopers. Another good movie, it's a shame so few people saw it. Now to business.
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In other news [16 Feb 2003|10:55pm]
Will-crushing lack of direction/talent, that whole being doctor plan was just god having fun at my dreams' expense. Damn it...
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